An Airing of Grievances

So, there have been a couple of things in France/Europe that are just down right annoying and I've got to get them off my chest!

Grievance #1: Cancer from secondhand smoke.

In both France and Germany, I'd say 60% of the "of age" population smokes cigarettes. What a n-a-s-t-y habit! Thankfully it's not allowed in the public transportation, but be warned; as soon as you can see the sunlight from beneath the ground, a white cancer stick is bound to appear in their hands, quivering with excitement and lit as soon as their foot hits the top stair. The consequence? You emerge from a stinky tunnel just in time to start hacking in cloud of smoke. Nice.

The Bright Side: I am so grateful that business owners and our housing complex are aware of this toxic problem and smoking is generally only permitted outside.

Grievance #2: Quick, somebody tell that woman she forgot her pants!

I knew we were bound to see some nude art and statues, but I was not aware that I would see living breathing nudity walk by us in the streets! Ok, maybe that is a bit of an exaggeration, but women wear the most scandalous things! With the selections I am seeing from their wardrobe, there would be absolutely no point in buying a slinky nighty to surprise your sweetie, cause that's what he's seeing on a daily basis anyways. If I were alone, I would probably just roll my eyes and ignore it, but I've got my sweet hubby to think of and I wish I could protect him from the edgy felines that will inevitably be walking past every other minute!

The Bright Side: When the wind gusts through the streets and you hear a dozen shrieks from all around, I can smile in satisfaction knowing my pants are exactly where they should be...ON!

Grievance #3: Excuse'moi!

There is no denying that the public transportation in Europe is amazing! We can get from one side of this massive city to the other in about 45 minutes when we ride the underground metro. However, people are NUTS down there. This is seriously what it looks like at some of the stations and ALL of those people intend to get on. Mind you, the train is full to the brim already and there is only 20-30 seconds from the time the doors open until a loud buzzer sounds and they snap forcefully shut. Even if Burke and I are at the front at the train pulls up, we will doubtless be bullied and pushed aside by frantic passengers loading or disembarking. Not to mention that it stinks like major B.O. and wet dog. Ew.

The Bright Side: It is amazing that in a city of 8 million people (which apparently doubles in size during the summer tourist season) we can navigate around speaking next to no French and still see a ton of cool stuff.

Grievance #4: Parle vous Anglais?

Alright, there is no denying it - our French stinks. When I listen closely, like in church today and concentrate really hard, all I can hear is a series of lengthened vowels and soft consonants strung together in an unbroken chain of sound. Burke is really great about studying his French daily and has even asked a few questions successfully such as, "Excuse me, can you please help me find..." Unfortunately, we're not quite as successful at understanding the proceeding response to our questions and usually end up gesturing and nodding our heads, saying "Merci" and walking away, probably in the wrong direction.

The Bright Side: Since English borrowed about 10,000 French words in the 13th-15th centuries, there are a lot of words that are spelled exactly the same, but sound completely different. Great for reading the language, not so great when you're trying to speak it.

Grievance #5: Frustrations with the disorganized French

Burke and his 7 classmates are the guinea pigs for the double degree MBA program and we hope the next groups won't have some of the problems we have run into. For those of you who don't know, Burke and I were promised an apartment that we were supposed to be moving into this week, but suddenly our housing "fell through." They have given us no real explanation as to why and although we will be paying a 100 Euros less to stay where we are, Cite Universitaire is on the outskirts of the city which means it takes about 45 minutes for Burke to get to class or for either of to get to anywhere worthwhile. This picture is of me in our bathroom/shower, just to show you how classy our dorm room apartment is. Burke's classes are also in disarray. We were given the impression that classes would be Monday through Wednesday, but apparently, the faculty are made up of actual business men in the city and his class schedule changes weekly according to their schedule, meaning sometimes there is no class at all! This would be fun if we weren't afraid that it will mess up the accreditation.

The Bright Side: The French Language and French Culture class that they're allowing me to take with Burke is awesome! We meet together for the culture class for an hour, learn the history of a certain site/area and then go out into the city and SEE it. Last week we got to take a boat tour of the city and count it as class hours. Awesome!

Grievance #6: Expensivo

Living in Paris is expensive! On our orientation day, they highlighted some of the cultural values of the French by comparing them to the Germans. They said that the Germans work hard all week and save their money to buy homes, travel or get an education. The French (or rather, Parisians) however work only 30 hours a week (which for most workers means they are done by Thursday afternoon) and save their money to buy food, alcohol and clothes. We've seen that to be true! It is SO expensive to buy food or anything for that matter. I had all of these lists of people that I wanted to buy gifts for, but I am afraid all you guys are getting are photos and chocolate! Sorry!

The Bright Side: We get really excited when we go to the Lidl (literally a "little" grocery store) 2 tram stops from our house and can get groceries for a decent price. We may not be eating gourmet when we eat at home, but at least we're saving tons of mula with our simple meals.

Grievance #7: Where's a Walmart when you need one?

Normally, I am not a huge Walmart fan, but I am sure missing that monopolizing megaplex now! You see, we didn't bring towels or dishes with us because we just assumed we would run to the store when we got here and pick up the necessities that we would need for two months. However, that is not as simple as it sounds. Shopping is SO different here. There are tiny shops for everything: wine, luggage, bread, wine, meat, clothing...(did I mention wine?)...but no where that you can find it all in the same place. It took us a WEEK to finally find a place where we could buy dishes and each utensil cost us 2.50 Euros a piece! Luckily, some girls in our housing gave us a heads up about a flee market in our neighborhood on Saturday mornings and we were able to score a pot and some plates there for under 5 Euros (that was a hilarious and disgusting experience in and of itself).

The Bright Side: I don't feel like there is any major corporation that dominates the city which means there are more "Ma and Pa" type shops that can survive here.

Grievance #8: We've been had!

So, my final complaint is that we totally got taken yesterday! Around all the tourist spots (Eiffel Tour, Sacre Coure, The Louvre, etc) there are African guys who roam in teams trying to sell trinkets and scarfs to tourists. We've been trying to avoid them as best we can, but we're too dang polite and they were finally pushy enough! We were at the Louvre this weekend and an African man came up to Burke with a little piece of string in a circle that he slipped over Burke's finger, all the while insisting, "Hey American, it's ok, no buy, it's ok." I was just about to point and laugh at Burke when the dudes partner came up and slipped a string around my finger too. Dangit! We both kept trying to say, "No Merci" but my dude asked where I was from and said, "Cool it Ms. Utah, this make you sexy lady!" In thirty seconds flat they had these bracelets on our wrist, securely tied and definitely not coming off. Then the guy starts telling Burke, "Give me somethin man, give me somethin." Ugh. 3 Euros later we walked away with our "rad" bracelets, determined to be more firm in the future. What a bunch of suckers.

The Bright Side: We've heard rumors that all of these guys are sending the money they make back to their African villages to help their families. That makes me feel a little better, but if nothing else, I hope they had a nice cup of coffee on us.