Eveyln Jeannine Anderson Bush

Last Wednesday Daphne and I (Burke had to stay and work) drove up with the Ridings to Logan for my Grandma Bush's funeral.  We pulled up late at night as an assortment of siblings, Aunts, Uncles and cousins were practicing a beautiful arrangement of "I Need Thee Every Hour."  I haven't seen most of my extended Bush relatives in years so being together, even for a brief time was really nice.  Once family prayer was said and everyone headed for their hotels/rooms, I stayed up late talking with Mom, Cassie, April, Daddy, Tasha and Elijah (who was passed out most of the time on the couch due to an all nighter for work the night before, poor brudder).  Dad expressed feelings about the experience with Grandma and the conversation evolved until April had us rolling with laughter reenacting the time she was attacked by a llama when she was out jogging.  She is such an animated story teller!  Again, I am grateful for the knowledge that our families are eternal so that gatherings following a death don't have to be full of tears and heartache, but can be spent enjoying memories and laughter too.

Daphne was up at 4 AM that morning and was a complete pill at the actual funeral.  I had to take her out in the lobby and try to listen to the talks through the overhead speakers while she squawked and caused mischief.  Aunt Maryanne gave a brief and beautiful life sketch.  Uncle Kirk spoke with peace and assurance of the gospel plan and shared meaningful poetry.  Bishop Zollinger shared kind words about our family trait of faith, especially in reference to my Dad's experience after being diagnosed with cancer 2 years ago - it was neat to hear his perspective of that trying time for our family.  There was beautiful music and prayers and then we all filed out behind the casket to make the 1 hour drive to Malad, Idaho (where Grandpa was raised and where they first met) where she was to be buried.  Dan and I didn't make the trip, but took the babies back to the house for their naps, but despite being up at 4, Daphne refused to nap for 2 hours!  I was exhausted and frustrated, but finally gave up as the family returned from the graveside and congregating for a luncheon at the chapel down the street from my parent's house.  I guess the one positive thing is that despite no sleep, Daphne was happy as can be with her cousins.

(Lydia pretending to write a note from Amelia's point of view to Daphne)

The time together passed far too quickly.  That night I had a long talk with Elijah, played games around the kitchen table with the family and woke up with Daphne again at 4 AM.  Oh boy.  But before I knew it we were back on the road again and I had a great time sitting between Lydia and Emmett and finding love notes from them in my bag after the trip.  I'm so lucky to have such sweet nieces and nephews!

(Photos taken from my sister Chelsea's blog)

In the week since the funeral I have pondered about Grandma Bush and, more specifically, my relationship with her.  I am ashamed and saddened to admit that I barely knew her.  My Bush Grandparents lived in The Dalles, Oregon (10 hours from Logan) and as I was growing up we saw them once a year - twice if we were lucky.  Even when they were in town with us, I didn't feel comfortable around them as my Grandpa was hard pressed to say more than a sentence and Grandma talked incessantly with such enthusiasm that she could go 2 hours straight without needing a single word of input from anyone else in the room!  Here are a few memories I do have of my grandparents.

1) They always brought a few freezer bags of dried apricots and apples whenever they came to visit.  The apricots were my favorite and I remember sneaking down to the basement fridge to hide away fistfuls of the delicious, chewy, orange fruits.

2) In their home in The Dalles they have a delightful living room with a wood burning stove and a nook with a window that overlooks the river in the distance.  It always seemed to be raining when I sat in that chair and curled up for hours with a good book, cozy and warm, drifting away into daydreams.  Grandma always made sure I had a snack while I read.

3) Indistinct memories of visiting a large building with a huge lawn where peacocks strutted. A stonehenge-ish display of giant rocks somewhere in Oregon.  Playing at "the castle park" near their home in the snow.  Riding a train around a park on another visit.  Going on walks around their neighborhood in the misty rain.

4) Knowing that Grandma and Grandpa worked in the temple in Portland Oregon and made the 1 & 1/2 hour drive every week to serve.

5) Seeing Grandma's bright eyes fill up with tears and grasping my hand in hers whenever she was telling a story that made her feel the spirit or any strong emotion. (I guess we know where I get it!)

6) Hearing her bare testimony with all her heart of Jesus Christ and truthfulness of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints many many times.

7) Watching Grandma and Grandpa in turn watch Daddy as he played the piano for them.  They were both so proud of his talent.

8) On one of their visits to Logan I came home from school when I was probably 15 or 16 and my grandparents had already arrived.  I walked in and said something to Mom about a boy at school and Grandma went wild teasing me.  It embarrassed me and made me really mad so I vacated the room shortly afterwards.  Later that night I heard Grandma repeat the things to my Dad that she had been teasing me about, but in a matter-of-fact way, saying that I had confided all of these things in her (like this boy brushing my face with the back of his hand), but it was all completely bogus.  I was shocked and angry and when I tried to correct her she tenaciously stood by the story as though it were true.  I cried my eyes out over the incident in my room that night.  I think Grandma must have been slipping mentally already, but I couldn't believe that someone I loved and looked up to would tell a bold-face lie like that.  That day my view of my grandparents changed forever.

9) Grandma telling me about the time her father bought her the most beautiful yellow dress she had ever seen in New York.  I must have heard that story a dozen times, but she always told it with the same delighted twinkle in her eyes.  She loved her Papa so!

10) I remember being in that same living room one year when I was probably 10 after a big dinner and board games with the family.  It was dark outside and I don't know if I had fallen asleep or if I was just pretending, but I woke up to Grandma standing in the middle of the room in an uniterrupted monologue as she read names out of her address book and would then proceed to give the history of the person, their children, the scandals in their family, the ill health, etc., before moving onto the next name on the list. I remember slightly lifting my head and glancing around the room to see everyone else in postures of sleep strewn across couches, bean bag chairs or curled up next to the fire.  No one stirred or made any acknowledgement of Grandma's recital, but that didn't seem to bother her one wit!  Finally, on the other side of the room, I saw Cassie (probably 15 or 16 at the time) peaking out from her arms.  I caught her eye and raised my eyebrows and we both buried our heads into our arms again to keep from laughing out loud at the scene.  I can still feel my body shaking with laughter as I tried to repress the sound!

It is dreadfully sad to me that I don't remember much else concerning my grandparents.  I know so little about their lives and understand even less about the impact they had on my Father's life until recently.  This experience has motivated me to do a few things differently.  First, once I finish my Grandma Ellsworth's history, I want to begin researching the Bush line.  Second, I want my children to know, really know, their grandparents and I will make every effort to create opportunities for the them to nurture that relationship.  Third, I want to continue to reach out to GG, but also to my Grandfather while he is still alive and build those relationships while I still can.